Nympho #1

She is on a long walk for weeks to cure herself, how is that going?

We had all watched the film Wild, the one with Reece Witherspoon in. It was a true story about how it transformed a young woman’s life from falling apart due to drugs and sex. They obviously thought maybe this would work for her.

But I failed even before I’d started the walk. Right at the start. The first hotel. Not sorry it was on the plane. But I’ll get to that. Maybe my heart isn’t really in it.

All my friends and all those boyfriends I cheated on, they would say, ‘You got to stop this sleeping around. You can’t just fuck whoever you meet. It’s not healthy. It gets you into trouble.’

Yeah, it did get me into scrapes sometimes, but it also got me out of scrapes. Sex is very powerful. I’ve only ever had a nasty little something once in my throat once from a glory hole, but apart from that, all that athletic fucking made me very fit. I can feel it now as I walk down this road, not a twinge. I could run it, if it wasn’t for the big pack on my back.

But still, they’d made me go. My friends got me into a room and did one of those interventions.

And who was there? Let me list them.

Cherry: I snogged her and brought her off at a party while he boyfriend watched and wanked himself off. His cum hit us both.

Josh: Cherry’s still boyfriend, whom I had sucked off while Cherry wasn’t watching, and never knew, and then who I fucked in his car on a number of occasions after that. Oh, and told me I looked hot later that night when we were mingling.

Josh’s friend: I can’t remember his name, but he is very good at head, both on cock and cunt. I have seen him do both, and felt him do it too. No one ever touches him. He’s weird like that, but he seems to like it. So many people use his mouth. Josh is bisexual but won’t tell Cherry.

Graham: He is much older, as you can tell by his terrible name. Grey ummmm. He fucked me years ago and is an uncle by marriage. Don’t worry, not that many years ago, but I think that was not because either of us didn’t want it, but we didn’t bump into each other in a bar, start flirting, and boom, I rode him on a toilet in the gents. My only regret is that we didn’t use the women’s. Men’s toilets are for slobs.

Jones twins: No, I can’t tell them apart. So no, I don’t bother with their first names. Yes, I have been double penetrated by them. Yes, all the dirty things you’ve heard about twins are true. No, I’m not going to say anything more.

Emily: Best friend and an early lover. We didn’t really do much with each other, but we used to go on the hunt with me together. We’ve fucked the same guy on the same night loads, and we’ve done their best friends. We went to sex clubs and got gangbanged, holding each other’s hands. We even tried flory holes for the first time with each other. We set up so many sexual dares that she truly is the most dangerous person I know, and I am the most dangerous person she knows. Two years ago, she met Josh, and they got married and are monogamous. And she is so annoying these days. She organised the intervention.

Emily’s husband: I want to fuck his brains out so bad. I will. One day.

Jaz: He has a stupidly big cock. He posts it everywhere he can. I have sat on it a lot, and it hurts. But it is fun. I have basically done porn movies with him.

Emily’s parents: Her Dad hits on me all the time. No of course I’ve not fucked him. What do you take me for? Oh, right, yeah. So, you’re right. I even fucked him that evening because he drove me home…

Astrid: She kept winking at me the whole time during the intervention; she was trying to make me laugh. She likes kinky things and always wants me to go along to dungeons with her. Mostly so she can get to know the men who are going to whip her when she still has a friend there in case it goes wrong. I find it hard to know what could go wrong as she’s tough as a miner's boot and can take pain like a saint and punch like a heavyweight. Shit, those guys are lucky I’m there, I think. But it’s fun to watch the extremes she gets pushed to. And you’re right, I do sometimes join in. Crack!

Mal, Jason, Gurinder: All had me at once, once.

Mal, Jez, Carter: All had me at once, once.

Mal: Has had me a lot more than once, on his own.

Si: Is an ex-boyfriend who encouraged me to sleep around.

Xavier: Dumped me right off when he found out about something I’d done when I was seeing him. But he always comes back to me, pleading when he’s drunk, to lick his ass because his girlfriend won’t do it. No one else will do it. Sometimes I do it for him, sometimes I tell him to fuck off.

Robin: Is trans and so much fun in bed. They aren’t trying to make me laugh with winks, but look utterly miserable.

I’ve played strip poker with dares with nearly all those who were present, and like half a dozen still tell me regularly that they get off to the pictures of me with the Mars Bar.

I have dick pics from most of the guys in here, and have pics of so many of the women giving blowjobs. Mostly, they’ve sent them to me themselves. Yeah, sometimes it’s bastard lovers. I’ve been filmed by half a dozen of these guys, and that’s just the ones I’m sure about.

Loads of them are on dating apps that mostly cater to quick fucks and two of the couples I see on swingers sites, and yes, in-person swinger or kink events. Am I done?

I could probably go on, but you get the point. It was the most fabulous bunch of hypocrites you could imagine having in one room, but I loved them all. Most of them, and they were so sincere in their insincerity, that with that, and the fact that they were paying for a holiday, that I had to smile, cry, and flirt subtly all night so that I could make them believe I would change.

And maybe I will. But not it seems at my first hostel.

A lesbian couple. An open shower system. A lot of wet, soapy water.

I was in heaven! Foreigners can be delightful, you know. Although I am not sure where they were from? Maybe I should make sure I find out and do one of those shag maps, all the places you’ve fucked people from.

They weren’t from here, but I am sure I’ll get to somebody from here. After all, all I need to do is stick out my thumb, hitch a lift (I’m not supposed to. I need to walk the whole thing), and boom, I’ll bed a local.

My thumb is itching. Well, something is…